Emotional Dependence: How To Eliminate Addiction To Your Partner

Emotional dependence

Emotional dependence is a feeling that is created between two people and that can refer to different planes: relationship of friendship, family, and partner. However, it is in the sphere of the couple that these dependent relationships most tend to appear that nullify the individuality of both members and become toxic, obsessive, and unstable.

In this article we want to discover how to eliminate the emotional dependence of the couple, giving you some good tips that you can start applying in your day-to-day life. Your relationship can get better and, for that, you must learn to be happy with yourself. This is the first step.

What Is Emotional Dependence?

Before we discover the keys to eliminating addiction in the couple, we must know the definition of emotional dependence. Dependence is a type of addiction that relates to needing someone else to feel good. Just as a person with drug addiction goes to drugs to meet their need, an emotional dependent turns to the person on whom he depends to get security, well-being, and tranquillity.

Causes of Emotional Dependence

The causes of emotional dependence are psychological and have to do with self-confidence, self-love, and self-esteem. According to psychology experts, three major factors generate emotional dependence, are the following:

  • Lack of self-esteem. It is the key factor that causes one person to generate dependence on another. The lack of self-love, trust, and self-confidence can make you need someone else so you can feel greater security.
  • Afraid to be alone. Fear of loneliness is also often one of the causes of one person feeling dependent on another. Fear of being alone or ending up alone in life can make someone accept abusive situations or toxic relationships.
  • Psychological abuse. Often, emotional dependence is linked to having suffered psychological abuse. An abusive person may have nullified the safety of a person with voracious judgments, criticism, with devastating comments… A type of relationship that is lengthening in time and that, little by little, is nullifying the person who receives it, who feels guilty.

How To Eliminate Emotional Dependence?

If you think you’re living in an emotional dependency relationship, you should know that you can still redirect the situation. The important thing is that you recognize that there is this dependency, that you do not be ashamed of it (passes many more times than you imagine), and that you feel like being better off with yourself and your partner. Here are the essential tips that will help you eliminate emotional dependence:

  • Invest in you. You must stop thinking about others and the needs of your partner, to make you the center. Think about what you want, what you like, what you want. Give him time for that hobby you like so much (without your partner, obviously), get your hobbies back, and breathe a space for you, just for you.
  • Surround yourself with yours. Often, emotional dependence causes the relationship with friends or family to be lost. Therefore, one of the essential steps to breaking this dichotomy is you approach the people who are part of your life again. Retrieve them, and make plans independently again, without your partner always having to be included.
  • Respect the individuality of both. There’s one clear thing: a couple is made up of two independents who decide to be together. But they don’t have to share absolutely everything. Respecting your space is essential for you to have a healthier relationship, some days you will feel like making plans together, and, others, not. And it’s okay. Then you’ll have more things to tell you.
  • Forget the past. What is clear is that if you want to eliminate emotional dependence it is because you want to step forward and improve your relationship as a couple. Therefore, it is best to put the disputes and conflicts of the past behind, and, together, you are willing to build a stronger and stronger relationship.
  • Enjoy your loneliness. Finally, we recommend that you learn to be lonely. Deter dates or moments just for you, try not to call anyone, not meet anyone, and enjoy your company. Read a book, walk, take a relaxing bath, listen to music, paint a picture… whatever you want. But look at me, look a lot.